Weight and personal confidence

For the longest, I didn't weigh myself. I knew when clothes were tight, and I knew when they were loose. I always felt better when I could cinch the belt a little tighter though.

 I never obsessed about it, and would buy clothes of different sizes and not worry about what size I was but only if I liked the clothes. If I liked it, I bought it.

I remember at Disney, some girl had a meltdown because the size that fit her was a really big number. But she was a lovely girl, and the size of Disney uniforms didn't mean anything to me but it devastated her.

And it's not like I'm just saying it, she wasn't big. And maybe Disney sizes are just with big numbers. I have no idea? And to me it means nothing.



But she was devastated.

For myself,

 I didn't really think about it too much.

But as the months went on, I was happy as my waist got smaller, working outside, lifting things, and walking a lot.

I still remember trying to carry six costumes at Magic Kingdom and the name of my Animal Kingdom costume color, peanut butter!

And then there was the time I got off the bus, carrying my costumes and just because I had gotten smaller, my shorts were falling off but the lady behind me thought I was doing it for a fashion statement and scoffed in derision.

How many times have I judged people for wearing pants too big?



So I guess it serves me right.









Yesterday, I was being weighed and I guessed how much it was going to be. My mom, said it was going to be much less, and she was right!

So, despite the mantra that muscle weighs more than fat, and despite the fact that I can already tell my stomach is littler than usual, and despite the fact that I think intermittent fasting is a good idea for me, at least right now, I was so happy when I heard that little number!

What's going on there? Have I been indoctrinated into thinking that everybody needs to lose weight? No matter where they're at?


These influential people, that I can't identify. Are they the controllers, or the media or the elite?

Are they the same people that say we have to drink water every second of every day?

They probably sell us bladder control pills as well.